“The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of heaven and earth, does not live in temples made by man, nor is he served by human hands, as though he needed anything, since he himself gives to all mankind life and breath and everything” (Acts 17: 24-25).
“For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty Savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With His love, He will calm all your fears.” (Zephaniah 3:17)
It can be hard for me to grasp that God, who doesn’t need anything from me, can still delight in me.
But this past Sunday I finally understood.
This new understanding came on the heels of one of the sweetest Christmas moments of my life.
This year, I sent in money for a fundraising event at school where they take your child to a pop-up holiday store to shop for a list of people you provide. It is supposed to teach them money management and give them practice purchasing for another person.
When the gifts came home, I wrapped them and placed them under the tree with the appropriate labels, thinking that my son’s participation in gift giving was over.
On Christmas Day, Caleb approached me while I was eating breakfast. He was saying “Mommy, Caleb!” Usually these words mean breakfast is over for Mommy and he needs help, but when I turned around he had a gift in his hand. He was reading the label that said “To: Mommy From: Caleb”.
I knew what it was, of course. I had wrapped it. But this was the first time Caleb had ever handed me a gift and shown interest in me unwrapping it.
The social challenges that accompany autism means awareness of others is slow to develop. So you adjust your expectations and you learn not to take it personally. And sometimes, maybe because you have switched over to autopilot, you stop expecting connection.
So this small moment, this seemingly simple act, flooded me with joy and shock.
And I got it. My kid was basically handing me a gift I purchased and wrapped. So basically, the same as anything I offer to God. But because I delight in my son, as God delights in us, the thing being offered doesn’t matter. The approach, the interest, the connection–the evidence of love–is the actual gift.
Lord, thank You for delighting in us. You have and are everything. You need nothing from us. Yet, Your love for us is boundless. Help us to stop doubting our worth to You and run with open arms to be with You. Amen.